Mark Joseph

Mark Joseph overall score: 82

Mark Joseph is a well known steak joint down by NYC's South Street Seaport. The word among steak-folk is that one of the owners was formerly employed with Peter Luger's in Brooklyn, but then left to start his own legacy. As it turns out, a fellow Carnivore friend of mine knows one of the other owners or investors in a roundabout sort of way through the butchery and meat packing industry; my friend worked for a meat company that one of the owners ran. It is comforting to know that the pedigree of this place is firmly grounded in the meat biz. This rating comes on the heels of my second time eating at this fine establishment. Groupon had a great $25 for $50 offer recently so I jumped on it in hopes to refresh my meat senses in order to give this place a thorough review.

1) Flavor: 8

My first time here, my wife and I got the steak for two (porterhouse). It comes out on a sizzling hot plate, cooked a little under from what you ordered. The plate is so hot that you literally finish cooking the slices to your liking right on the plate. Now, this is tradition in the spirit of Luger's, and it is cool from a theatrical perspective, but not cool for other reasons. I am not a fan of it. Why, you ask? The meat has not had a chance to rest when it is sliced. This creates a pool of blood/juices under the steak that ruins the crisp texture of the bottom while draining it of moisture, rendering the meat dry if you don't scarf it down ASAP. It tasted good enough though, so there's that. This trip, I went with the ribeye to truly test Mark Joseph's meddle. It was good. Crispy outer edges and crust - perfectly cooked - well rested, well seasoned.

2) Choice of Cuts & Quality available: 8

This place is pretty bare-bones. Porterhouse for two, three or four; a "sirloin," which I assume and hope is a strip; a bone in ribeye (thank God they had the sense to leave the bone in), and filet. There's nothing wrong with a bare-bones approach to steakhouses. I appreciate it, actually. If a place is willing to really focus their skill on the basic 4 cuts and make them perfect, that is something to be proud of. This is what Mark Joseph strives for. They offer the "chopped steak" as well, the large, glorified, bun-less hamburger, but I think it is a wasted menu item. Throw a skirt on there, or another dead animal other than the steer. They DO have lamb chops though, which I always am tempted to order at steakhouses but refrain from doing so. The quality is all prime, dry aged, so that is a feather in the cap.

3) Portion Size & Plating: 8

The portions are healthy here, at 28oz for the bone-in ribeye, and 16-20oz for filets. Plating is basic; hot white plates; nothing fancy, yet it still remains elegant. 

4) Price: 8

The steak for two is $82, which is fair in comparison to other high end NYC steak places. At $51, the ribeye is a bit on the high end. Eight oysters ran us $17, $16 for the tuna app, $10 for sauteed spinach, $12 martinis (after tax) and $4 per slice of bacon. Our total bill was $204 - and special thanks to Groupon again for knocking that additional money off.

5) Bar: 9

Nice bar. Three TVs (30-40inch flat screens), friendly bartender that mixes a good martini (filled high with fat olives), great scotch selection, and close to the seaport (nice environment).

6) Specials and Other Meats: 7

Aside from seafood, the only other meat Mark Joseph offers is lamb. I appreciate the gesture. The place basically says "fuck you" to chicken and other pussy meats. I think a cherry pepper pork chop or maybe something more game-oriented like venison could make a showing though and MJ would still keep that macho attitude. As for specials, there were none. Oh well.

7) Apps, Sides & Desserts: 9

I can't for the life of me remember what I had the first time we went here, so all I can do is judge based on this last visit. MJ seems to take the approach of "simple is better" or "showcase the quality of the ingredients" with their apps. They are all delicious. We had oysters on the half shell (creamy, crisp & cold), a slice of bacon (freaking AWESOME here - I even buttered it - yup - buttered bacon), tuna tartare (nice solid sushi grade chopped chunks, no fatty whiteness - nicely seasoned/dressed - very simple but yummy), and sauteed spinach (very nice - better than their creamed spinach, which we had the last time we went). For dessert we had the apple crunch pie, but it was not crunchy. It was served with a scoop of whipped cream that had me fooled into thinking it was ice cream at first. A point off for false advertising on that.

8) Seafood Selection: 7

Tuna, salmon, lobster, and (kick his ass) sea bass are the entrees to consider if you are going vaginal here. The appetizer menu is riddled with great looking shellfish too; clams of every preparation (including raw), chilled oysters, and multiple preparations of tuna, crab and shrimp. My wife got the lobster tails, which were done very nicely.

9) Service: 10

Service is top notch. Well dressed in the traditional white shirt & bow tie, attentive but not annoying, and they know their meat. Sometimes I like to test them on their knowledge, but there was no need; the waiter immediately told me all about the ribeye when I asked how big it was. A good note here: the bartender remembered my drink order after I sat down. When I first get to a steakhouse, I like to order a drink at the bar, assess things, etc. When the waiter put my order for a second martini in, the bartender remembered, and asked the waiter if it was the same customer. Nice touch. I like that. he table breads were a nice assortment of raisin pumpernickel, slices of rye, onion bread buns, and standard dinner rolls - all toasty and warm. The butter was cool/cold, but it was whipped so not that hard to spread against the warm bread (and bacon).

10) Ambiance: 8

The owners took the Luger concept and make it more upscale. The dark wood furniture is contrasted with the bright white linens and curtains. Yet you don't get a sense of pompousness or over-elegance. It is the right mix of manliness and culture. The bathrooms could use a little work - they are standard bar type bathrooms, but with a good smell and some interesting Yankees memorabilia.

J&R (Islip, Long Island)

J&R overall score: 65

 

J&R is a local Long Island steakhouse chain. They are reasonably priced, decent places to eat.

 

1) Flavor: 5

J&R usually does a better job (I've eaten at several locations and usually it is good), but my latest experience wasn't too great. My friend and I both ordered the marinated 24oz ribeye - his medium rare and mine medium - but both of ours came back two levels overcooked than we ordered.  His was medium well, and mine was well. The marinade here is heavy on soy sauce flavors, and I think they let the meat hit the grill while it was still wet with marinade, which is a big no-no in steak cookery ethics. Unlike Murtha's, which knows how to marinate a steak for maximum flavor extraction, J&R simply ruined theirs. I chalk the over cooking up to bad kitchen staff at this particular location, since I've had better steaks at their other locations. They offer standard grilled as well as marinated in terms of methods of cooking. This was my first time trying the marinade. I was unimpressed with it. As I said earlier - too heavy on the soy.

  

2) Choice of Cuts & Quality available: 7

All choice cuts, but lots of choices here at J&R. They have all four basics, and then some, offering t-bone, roumanian, pork and lamb cuts. They may lack a strip, but for the price of the porterhouse, you can just grab that and take the filet side home with you. They also offer three sizes of prime rib.

 

3) Portion Size & Plating: 7

The ribeye (their signature steak) comes in two flavors: 12oz for pussies, or 24oz for men. The porterhouse is 36oz, the t-bone is 24oz, and the filet is 7oz. Prime rib comes in 8, 12 or 18oz portions. These are average for a good steakhouse, so for a cheap joint, they are great.

 

4) Price: 8

You get a large meal here for your money. The total bill for two 32oz beers and two 24oz steak dinners (they come with veggies, potato, and soup or salad) came to $82 with a generous tip included. Not bad!  I deducted two points based on not getting the best flavor for your money - but as my dad always says - "shit you pay, shit you get."

 

5) Bar: 7

Not the best place to hang out, but they do have a cool bar. I did not order my standard martini this time, since I saw that they had monstrous 32oz beers and a good wheat beer on tap. The bar area is nice, and we sat on high tables there rather than in one of the two dining rooms that flanked it.

 

6) Specials and Other Meats: 6

No specials here at J&R - their menu is already huge and full of selections. They have pork chops, ribs, lamb chops, and chicken by way on non-beef.

 

7) Apps, Sides & Desserts: 6

We didn't order any sides or apps, since the steaks come with veggies and potato in a composed plate. The french fries were well executed; the veggies were a below-average mix of green beans, onion and broccoli. Dessert sounded mediocre so we passed on that. The salad was above average, but nothing more than good diner fare. The bread for the table was warm and toasted, and they also served a pasta salad with a nice big pickle along with it. A point for that!

 

8) Seafood Selection: 6

Lobster, salmon, tilapia, shrimp, and flounder were under the seafood section. No clams or oysters on the half shell!  Damn you J&R. I may have ordered an app if you had them.

 

9) Service: 7

We saw our waiter 3 times: Once to take drink orders, once to take food orders, and once to get the bill. Nothing was done bad, and nothing exceptional either. It was busy, even at a late 8:30/9:00 seating, so good marks for not screwing anything up!

 

10) Ambiance: 6

The decor is kinda bare in comparison to other J&R interiors. The tables had white paper on them as opposed to the red & white checkerboard or weathered wood of other locations. My thinking is that they tried to make this location look more up scale since it is in a nice looking stand-alone building. It needed something.